Death Before Dishonor
by RedHairedGoddess
Summary: Mikhail and Raven's pain as their son chooses the dawn.


Author's Note: Christine Feehan hasn't given him a name yet, but this story is about the boy Raven recently gave birth to that Lara helped save. For the purpose of this story, I named him Michael.

Mikhail awoke deep within the earth with a terrible feeling of dread in his heart. He had not been born with the gift of visions as his father had, but he couldn't dispel the dread and apprehension swamping him. Beside him Raven stirred, and Mikhail quickly waved a hand to open the earth. Though she had long ago gotten past her fear of being buried, she preferred to wake above ground, and he tried to oblige her. She smiled at him and then frowned as she felt his emotions. "_Mikhail, what is it_," she asked with concern, communicating with him mind to mind as lifemates did. "_Is there a vampire nearby?_" He didn't believe a vampire was responsible, since he had scanned upon waking, but he believed something bad was about to happen. And he never would have let her surface if a vampire had been close to them.

"_No_," he responded. "_But something is wrong. I feel it_."

Far away from his parents' resting place, Michael awoke hours later, only a single hour before dawn. He had been healing from grave injuries from his last hunt. If he had wanted to live he would have just stayed in the ground, but he didn't. He could no longer go on without risking his soul; he knew this. It was time for him to seek the dawn. Many of the males had found their lifemates since Xavier had been dealt with, but he hadn't been that fortunate. Michael had held out for as long as he was able, was even older than his father had been when he had made the decision to meet the dawn, but it had been in vain. He had destroyed many vampires over the years to protect his people, and it had left its mark. His soul was in tatters and he craved he peace of eternal rest. He had given his race many years of service, but he owed them one last thing. He was determined to go quietly from this world to the next. He would never choose the path of the vampire. Michael shifted into the form of the bird, wanting to fly and be free as the bird for one last time before going to tell his parents of his decision, as he had promised to do centuries ago.

Mikhail knew the moment he saw Michael that he had come to tell them he was going to meet the dawn. Mikhail had made him promise this centuries before, hoping he could talk him out of it. But he knew just by looking at him that that wouldn't happen. It was too late; Michael hadn't found his lifemate in time. He and Raven were going to lose their son. Tears pricked his eyes, but he held them back. His son deserved respect for his decision, not added guilt, even if he couldn't feel it. Before his son could say a word, Mikhail told him, "I know." Raven frowned, then stared in horror as she picked the information out of Mikhail's head. He hadn't tried to hide it; she needed to know. "No," she whispered, pain evident in her voice. She looked like she was about to cry. "Mother, it is time," Michael said firmly. She shook her no, trying desperately to think of something to convince him to hold on just a little longer. "_Raven_," Mikhail said quietly as he turned to her, "_We must respect his decision. Every Carpathian male without a lifemate must make this choice at some point, and I am proud of our son's decision. He chose his honor. We cannot ask more of him than that_." She slowly nodded, resolved to say nothing more, despite feeling like she was being ripped apart inside. Mikhail turned back to his son. " May you walk with honor, my son," he said formally. Michael nodded and shifted into a bird, flying away. Raven and Mikhail watched him go, knowing this was the last time they would see their son, their hearts breaking. It was both easier and harder to go through it together. Each felt the other's pain, but they also didn't have to go through it alone; it was a shared misery. They reached out to their son, determined not to leave him until they absolutely had to. Michael was calm and stoic, totally accepting of what was to come. They waited until just moments before dawn to go to ground, ignoring the painful blisters from the sun. Raven wept softly and Mikhail tried to comfort her while dealing with his own roiling emotions. As the earth closed over them, they felt as though they were engulfed in the terrible light before their son cut off their attempt to reach out to him.

When they woke at sunset, they were silent, neither daring to say anything, afraid something either one said would make the grief worse. "_We should inform Savannah_," Raven murmured. Mikhail shook his head. Gregori had felt his distress earlier and Mikhail had filled him in on the situation. Savannah had been devastated to learn that she was going to lose her younger brother. "_She knows. Gregori is with her and is helping her through it_." Tears glittered in her eyes and Mikhail pulled her close. Together they stared off into the night, remembering the beautiful little boy they had raised into a man. He had become a strong and powerful hunter, a wonderful Carpathian with great honor. He had reminded Mikhail of Jacques when he was young, a male that helped the others remember light and emotion long after his 200th birthday. Michael's presence would be greatly missed, and mere grief didn't even begin to describe their pain at losing him. Mikhail and Raven would not see their son again for many centuries to come. This realization made the loss even deeper. Until they saw him again, they would have to hold onto his memory. It was all they had.


End file.
